Don’t Let Loneliness Win!

Lizan left this comment to Loneliness – Even in a Crowd

“I sometimes feel absolutely deadly lonely, particularly when facing the weekend. I am so totally alone, it’s painful to think about…….. I am convinced it was meant to be” 

 I think we can all relate in one way to that feeling, when you are going through the grief process. I know I have often felt, was I born to be lonely? I believe though that human beings are born to love, that the ability to feel, the ability to love is what separates us from other species or even machinery! Loneliness takes hold when WE let it in. 

Now there are days when it is fine to feel lonely, that is part of being human. However, what we have to be careful of as widows or widowers, is allowing the loneliness to take hold, of accepting that as a basic human feeling. I don’t think that is true. I think the basic human feeling is wanting to be loved and accepted, when that is not present then loneliness is the down side.

Hey, words are great but I know bereavement can remove all the meaning from words and the emotions take over your brain! So small steps may be needed to control that loneliness to allow love back into your heart

•  Smile as you pass people in the street and see them smile back.
• Thank people. I got off the bus today and thanked the bus driver with a big smile – he looked back and said that it makes his day when people value him.
• Talk to people when you are out and about. Just a quick sentence, or a remark can start a conversation.
• Go to places where there are other people. I find the cinema a good place as people arrive together but when you are watching the film you are all individuals.

Grief is not about giant leaps of faith, coming to terms with death for me is taking small steps each day.

Photo by istockphoto