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After I wrote about how to heal a bite mark, one reader asked the very reasonable question of how to prevent a baby from biting in the first place. Steph wrote:
Q: My 12 month old son is used to being nursed to sleep, but with three teeth coming in at once, he is now also a dedicated biter.
He bites me so often and so hard that I have had to limit his nursing sessions for the first time. His first birthday ended in hysterical screaming all night… he couldn’t sleep without the breast, but can’t seem to feed without biting. It’s been like this for days.
I have been firmly telling him “no” and taking him off the breast when he does this, I have offered him cold things to chew on. Giving him infants’ paracetamol for his teeth seems to help a little, but it’s really not a permanent solution!!
Unfortunately, the only other advice I have received on this topic is to either bite him back or wean him… neither of which suits either my parenting plan or appeals to logic.
A: Steph, I’m sorry to hear that you’re getting bitten! That must be very distressing for you. Good for you for exploring gentle ways to get him to stop. I hope I can help by affirming what you’re already doing and offering some other things to try, and maybe some other moms will share some tips in the comments too!
Before we scare new mothers away from breastfeeding, first let’s reiterate that many if not most babies do not bite, and of those that do, for many it’s a one-time incident that does not cause injury and does not get repeated.
If a baby does bite, what should you do?
~ A bite might make you yelp involuntarily, but do not purposely yell at or frighten your child as this could cause a nursing strike (a refusal by the child to nurse at all). While it’s easier said than done, keep your reaction to a minimum so your baby doesn’t bite again just to see a repeat performance of your reaction.
~ If you can help it, don’t pull the baby off the breast without breaking the latch or you might risk damage to the nipple. As you state a firm “no” or “no biting,” break the latch by inserting a pinky finger in the corner of the baby’s mouth. Alternatively (and counter-intuitively), you can try pulling the baby into the breast or gently plugging the baby’s nose. Blocking the airway briefly will prompt the baby to open his mouth to breathe.
~ Analyze when in the nursing session the bite occurred. If the bite took place at the end of a nursing session, consider your child a great communicator — he’s certainly found a crystal clear way to tell you he’s done! He’s also given you a good clue about how to stop further biting. The key is to watch him at the breast during each feeding and anticipate when he is poised to bite again. In particular, watch for tension in the jaw that might signal a bite. As the baby stops sucking vigorously and begins to start pacifying, drifting off to sleep or showing other signs of boredom such as playing with his hands or turning his head to look around the room, gently break the latch. If he protests, you can consider switching sides and letting him continue to nurse as long as he’s actively suckling.
~ If you’re nursing your baby to sleep and he won’t settle without the breast, try the gentle-removal technique from The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night
~ If the biting is happening as your child is drifting off to sleep, consider changing up the sleep routine or adding in new elements. For a while I used a “white noise” alarm clock that played sounds of the forest, brook or ocean. My daughter began to associate those noises with going to sleep and was more likely to settle once the latch was broken. Some babies, particularly older ones, might accept a change in the sleep routine altogether such as: nurse first then rock in the rocking chair, sing songs, rest in the bed together etc.
~ If the bite happened at the beginning of the nursing session, run through the possible causes for the biting such as teething or frustration with waiting for letdown.
~ If a baby is teething, have him chew on a cold well-rinsed wash cloth before a nursing session to numb his gums. It can help to keep a supply of wash cloths in the freezer for this purpose. Over the counter pain medications and homeopathic teething tablets
~ If you think your baby is biting over frustration waiting for the milk to letdown, try hand-expressing or pumping just enough to get the milk to letdown before starting the nursing session.
~ If a baby is biting at the beginning of the nursing session and still needs to nurse again, you may obviously have reservations about putting the baby back to the breast. Stay vigilant in watching for signs of biting and keep your pinky finger poised to break the latch. If your baby bites and you break the latch, consider waiting a few moments before allowing the baby to nurse again. The older the child, the longer the wait and the greater the separation, i.e. for a 4-month-old a brief “no biting” and breaking of the latch might be sufficient. For an 8-month-old, you might break the latch and set the child down next to you or sit him up in your lap, just momentarily. For a one-year-old, you could stand him up on the floor next to you with a quick, “No biting. Biting hurts mommy. You can nurse again when you are ready to be gentle.” I’m talking a matter of seconds. You don’t have to wait for the child to show any acknowledgement or remorse. The point is not to frustrate or punish the child but rather to associate biting with the natural consequence of being removed from the breast and from the comfort of mom’s arms for a moment.
~ Praise your baby’s good behavior at the breast. In addition to creating a negative association with biting, create a positive association with not biting! Recognize your child with praise and kisses when he pops off the breast properly.
Moms, leave a comment if you have a tip for Steph. What are some gentle ways to deal with biting?
I find there is many ways to break your child of biting as your nursing, but the main one that I have found if you need to stay as calm as possible because if not the child will keep doing it just for the reaction, at times there will be a cry out and that’s not bad, but if you can’t handle the pain && stress then you need to rethink your options, there are more options out there than just letting them do it, or dealing with it. You need to know every option out there before you make the decision, Yesturday was the first time that my 9 month old son bite me while nursing. I yelped when it fist happend, but the second time i pulled him off patiently and calmly, told him no firmly, put him on the floor and walked away for a minute, when the minute was up, I picked him back up told him easy, nice touches, and latched him back on. He was fine after that for that nursing period, I’ve just been doing that firmly everytime he bites or when he nurses telling him “nice touches” “easy to mommy” && he seems to be getting the point wuickly. So it makes time, and patient to figure out what is the best for you && your child(ren).. Good Luch Mothers.
I don’t believe in causing pain to your child. What is wrong with you people?!?! Does somebody flick your cheek or mouth every time you curse or say something not so nice??? In addition… letting your baby cry it out is not the answer either. It teaches them that they cant trust you and not to mention the fact that it’s not good on their vocal chords. It can make them hoarse. “Crying it out” also speeds up their heart rate and causes them stress. I am a first time Mom and I have been breastfeeding my son for 8 months. Almost a week ago he sprouted his first tooth. He has always been somewhat of a biter… but it never really bothered me until he got a tooth. I tried delatching and telling him “no biting” but he never quite got it. So, I am now pumping. He gets 1/2 formula and 1/2 breastmilk in a bottle. I always hold him very close to me when he has his bottle to simulate the closeness of breastfeeding. Sometimes skin to skin as well. It took going through two different types of bottles to find one that he liked. We use the Tommee Tippee bottles sold exclusively at Babies R Us. The nipples on the bottle are the most similar to a natural nipple. I remain proud that I was able to breastfeed him for over 6 months. Most mothers I know couldn’t even make it passed the first couple of weeks for various reasons. Although, I never wanted to give him formula… at least I am still giving him 50% breastmilk. I say if you can handle the pain.. great! If not… I don’t find it necessary to put your little one and yourself through the stress of getting him/her to stop biting excessively. The stress is more harmful than a little bit of formula.
My 6month old is just getting his front 2 teeth and bites me as well and it’s everytime that I try and feed him I’m really not sure what to do….HELP
It’s important to remember the difference between harming someone and hurting them. The dentist hurts, but he doesn’t harm; he actually helps. My first and second children each bit me. I immediately flicked their mouths hard. Yes, they cried, but my son never bit me again (he had 6 teeth by 5 months, nursed until 17 months). My daughter tried it once more and got the same immediate, short-term, non-damaging pain in her mouth and she never bit again. Personally, I think an immediate consequence of short-term pain does not harm and is more gentle and instructive than detaching them a hundred times and letting them cry for hours on end. My daughter nursed until she was almost 3 and it was a wonderful experience.
I have twins, both have bit, one thinks its funny with pretty much everything I do to stop her. Whats worked for me: 1) lightly flick their cheek and say no while de-latching; 2) if it happens while waiting for the let down, massage, or have someone massage your shoulders (it helps!); 3) the key is to not give them the breast right away after de-latching so they associate biting with no-food.
My 8 month old son has recently started biting me and its every time I feed him. Its as soon as he latches and I tell him no and that it hurts and he will look up at me and smile or laugh. I thought last night that he drew blood but it was only teeth marks. Im a first time mother and need help. I love breast feeding him but not with the pain. HELP
my 1yr old has been biting for months through teething and what not and i’ve tried most technices and no solutions i also found by pluggin his nose briefly only made him lock jaw i am very good with pain and will breastfeed till 2 yrs through the pain but i am running out of resorses any other suggestions
I have a slightly different biting situation. It’s not an isolated or intentional bite. My 9 month old is nursing exactly the same as she always has, but with every suck her teeth are digging into my breast making it very painful. Any ideas on alternatives to weening would be greatly appreciated.
People say to just pull them off and try again “until they get the point” but what if they DON’T? My 8 minth old son has been doing this for weeks. He bites incredibly hard and he does every nursing session. Tonight I’ve been trying for over an hour and he still hasn’t gotten “the point”. He thinks it’s hilarious, really, and laughs when I admonish him whether gently or not, because after the 6th bite in a row I lose my temper and raise my voice. He is teething but oragel just makes his behavior worse because he hates it.
I’ve started to give my 15 week old baby a bottle before bed and she took to it quite well until last night she wouldn’t entertain it at all, so i put her back on my breast. Could there be a reason why she wouldn’t take it as she guzzled down the other one’s?
MY SON IS 17 MONTHS OLD AND HE IS NOT LEAVING BREAST FEED. HE CRYS A LOT IF HE IS NOT BREAST FEEDED. KINDLY LET ME KNOW HOW CAN I STOP MY BABY FROM BREAST FEEDING?
I guess not really an oppinion but a new question. I am having a problem with my daughter biting but a bigger issue is plegueing me right now. My daughters nap cycle is all messed up. She takes one nap well and wakes up about 1.5 hrs early from her other nap. she is only 5 months old and therefore should still be napping about 5 hrs through the day. If she was content when she woke up early I would think nothing of it, but she is miserable and cranky and soooo tired but unwilling to go back to sleep till her next nap period or bed time. This happened last month and this month right around my period. Could my menstral hormones be affecting her?
my 3 month daughter is teething already and bites me sometimes as well. what i do is break the latch let her cry for a few while i put orgel on her gums and wait till it kicks in then nurce her. If her gums aren’t hurting her then she don’t bite mabe you can try that to see if that works and try giveing him a bottle of milk instead of the breast its worth the try…
my daughter is 12 months and when she is throwing a temper tantrum she likes to get close to you and bite wherever she can she will even pull your hair and slap you in the face i need some advice how to prevent her from doing these things withought scaring her please help me
Hey I think the best thing to do is not to entertain the behavior just set her down and allow her to throw a fit i know it will be hard but she is seeking a reaction from u and if she doesnt get one then hopefully she will stop hope this help
I remembered this article and came back to it this morning when it happened to me. Matthew has started biting at the beginning of a nursing session. This is the 2nd time it’s happened today (and first time ever)- same breast each time, no problems on the other. Any ideas?