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Thongs for the tween set? How about belly baring shirts, lacy camisoles, and go-go boots? I’ve seen the last three on girls at my children’s school recently.
As of mother of two girls – a tween and soon to be tween, it’s getting harder and harder to filter out the influences. Just last week my youngest declared Gymboree off limits for ever – it’s babyish, you know, and my tween tells me she likes Aeropostle better than Children’s Place. Luckily, she is tiny for her age and won’t fit into Aeropostle’s clothes for ages.
Inside Motherhood is dealing with this issue today, too. Her post is titled Can we keep our little girls little? The sexualization of the pre-teen set and it is a response to an article she read in today’s paper. Check it out and be sure to let us know how you feel.
I can’t believe some of the things they are advertising to tweens. Thongs and mini skirts and super tight jeans – I always found these way too uncomfortable to wear. How are you meant to be active in them?
I went through this phrase when I was in my pre-teens. I adored my thongs because they were cute with pink hearts or cherries on them and no one saw my underwear, my mom made sure of that. I dressed very modest when I was younger and still do.
But now is slightly different with the clothes available for girls. Personally I would have no problem if my daughter wanted a thong because they would be hidden from view. But it’s things like tank tops and super tight jeans I would look out for. Like low riser jeans that show your thong when you bend over. I also don’t like see through tops where your bra shows through not right for a child.
I’m a teen, and I have been reading all of your comments. I agree, it is hard to find clothes that actually decent to wear. And I don’t understand the whole bikini thing. I’m not really self conscious of my body, and I still like to cover it up. I think that the whole phase of trashy clothes is a part of the all time young and self conscious part of being a tween or teen. Everybody is too worried about what other people will think about them and rumors being spread around. I know that people talk about my clothes. One time, a girl told me that my girl boxers were “granny panties” just because they weren’t a thong. And I bet if I was like every other girl that worried about the social image of high school, that I would’ve been bothered by this for me. But, instead, I don’t care about the pointless high school gossip and I am more worried about how trashy other people are willing to look just so they can fit in.
I know, people say all the time talk to your kids about this and talk to your kids about that. But I am PLEADING that you talk to your kids about how being self conscious is a phase and is completely normal, that high school images are only going to last through high school. When you graduate, you probably will never see those kids who spread rumors about you ever again. You don’t need thongs and (forgive my language) slutty clothes to be cool. Just keep it classy and use your wits and personality to win over your peers.
After a friend of mine finding thong underwear in the toddler department, we decided to take action in stopping this appalling fad of “Prosti-tots.” There’s a cause at both FB and MS. Please show your support a petition will be at both causes, soon! Thank you.
I am in sixth grade. Yes, some kids (barely) are slu**y. One girl wears WAY TOO TIGHT jeans. U could see her undies through them. So yeah- she bought a thong. No one in my grade wears any slu**y clothes. Usually we wear jeans- preferably tighter but not gross. Abercrombie jeans are a little pricey for most people ($40-$70) but last literally for like 2 years. I got a pair of jeans in fourth grade- still fit, won’t be gross if i get bigger. Abercrombie is stretch so if your daughter would be a 12 slim. 10 regular might work better unless she is tall and thin. Thats why i go with slim. Most people, not me wear Abercrombie tees or v-neck (no, not glow- and u wear a cami or tank underneath). Hoodies from abercrombie or hollister are pretty common, too. If you ask me the styles in my grade are more boring than revealing.
While I would agree that these bras can be a little too much for a 10 year old there is nowhere else to buy them. The bras in the regular womans department are not small enough so for the tween or for the grown woman like me who wears them these are a godsend. the ones for women just don’t go small enough. And these are much better priced.
I don’t have a problem with tween fashions at all. Where does everyone find these “prostitot” clothes?? Gap Kids is great. So is Gymboree – though a bit too cutesy and “precious” at times for my 10 year old. I love Tommy Hilfiger kids – trendy yet classy designs. Zara Kids is also amazing with great styling!! I often buy online from designers like Ella Moss or Sister Sam. Also the French brands like Catimini, Jean Bourget or Ikks are very cool and well made. I don’t find that there’s really any problem with slutty girls’ fashions. My daughter doesn’t wear or want them and neither do her friends. Frankly I wouldn’t even know where to look for them!!
Kira Plastinina’s clothes are perfect for tweens! I got a lot of great things for my daughter. Fashion forward but not slutty!
I love this website. I was looking for party ideas when I came across it. My almost 10 year old is starting to “blossom.” We went to Target to purchase a few training bras to make her more comfortable. I almost fell over when I saw underwire, padded training bras!! I say if a girl is ready for these type of bras, she should not be shopping for them in the girs/tween section, she should be looking in lingerie! I LOVE the term “Prosti-tot!!!”
I thought it was just me! I mean, I walk into a place like walmart looking for.. say.. a one piece swimsuit, and all i can find are bikinis (why does a toddler need a bikini, let alone a pubescent Tween?) Just as hard to locate ANYTHING that doesnt make my daughter look like Prosti-tot (a word i will now use instead of “street walker”). I’ve told her that the styles are highly inappropriate for her age level (not to mention her maturity level!) and that she will have plenty of time to dress like that when she is 18. While she may not always like it, she does understand.
How do we get around the *cough sputter* FASHION?
Simple. We invest a little more up-front money. Pick up a multi-pack of BOY’S tshirts. Plain old white or multi-color. Wander over to the craft store or section and spend a few more $$ than you had planned. We bought Sparkly Glitter Deco Fabric Pens ($14.99 for 6) several iron on decals (her choice, mostly. most ran about $2.50 multi packs with 40 ran about $10) and some heat transfer designs.
We used the heat transfer on a couple Ts, but found out rather quickly that ANY additional heat erased the transfer.. so we used the glitter pens to spice up the transfer and keep it permanent.
From this point on, she laid out the iron ons how she wanted them and poof! we have 100% K-Originals. some of them turned out rather awesome. So far the Glitter pens have been used on 5 Tshirts, her book bag, her Canvas Ring binder, hiking boots, canvas shoes, leather shoes, blue jeans, and a couple other things that escape my memory. I bought a second package of the glitter pens (only because was the last pack) but the first set hasn’t run dry yet… VERY worth $15, and my daughter has styles that i not only approve of, but that she will actually wear proudly!
We have invested somewhere around $100 on clothing and roughly $50 on the iron ons and pens. Oh… These pens come in 38 flavors, so you can get the bright, bold, pastel, glittery, whatever floats your boat.. and boys can use them too (of course, most wont be interested in it i think)
I agree that tween and even Teen fashion has gone way to far. Check out my CLEAN shirts promoting a pure lifestyle at my website.
For really long links, like permalinks to a blog post, pasting the whole thing in often causes it to break and then people who are less web savvy can’t figure out how to get to the destination. It’s worse in e-mail discussion lists, but it happens in blog comments, too, so I always use the tinyURL unless it’s a super short link because that’s guaranteed to work.
But here’s the whole link for that one:
http://www.stltoday.com/stltoday/lifestyle/columnists.nsf/mamalogues/story/E60128E45845BEB48625712C006C2605?OpenDocument
kk
I don’t mean to change the subject but what is up with the whole tiny URL bit?
I don’t click on links that use tiny url.
You all will appreciate this, then:
http://tinyurl.com/2qsmfk
My friend Dana tells it like she sees it, and apparently so do her kids!
kk
As a parent and tween boutique owner, my customers are constantly telling me that they’re so happy to find girl’s clothes in my store that don’t have the”hoochie mama” factor. We don’t specialize in modest or prim clothing, and in fact it’s all very modern and stylish. It’s just not trashy!
A company recently pitched me t-shirts with rhinestone martinis on them, modeled by buxom 20 year olds. Blecch.
I know this may be a stretch, but sometimes I think Moms let their young girls wear these “sexy” clothes is because their daughters still have the figure for it. It isn’t appropriate, but sometimes I wonder if this is part of the logic.
Thong underwear at OSH KOSH???? Forgive a cliche, but what is the world coming to?
kk
I can remember a couple years back when I went to our local OSH KOSH outlet store and saw thong underwear for girls. THAT really ticked me off.
The sexualization of children is one of my big issues. My friend’s fiance calls today’s girls “prosti-tots.” I saw the term in a recent article (Newsweek?) about this very topic, and about how role models for young girls are anything but role models these days. The key, I think, is to lead by example and to talk with your kids early, frankly, and often about your values.
Maggie – I’m okay with Limited Too and the new Justice – Just for Girls. But only if its on sale, got a coupon, or really think I can get two kids worth of wearing out of it.